Have you ever been around people that talk about how awful and negative everything is? Can’t, don’t, won’t… Negativity can be very unhealthy, not only for the one doing it but for those that have to listen, just like smoking it affects others too. Before the law against smoking in public places was made effective, 2 workers died every day in the UK from passive smoking in work environments, and about 8000 from home environments affecting children too, that often get asthma attacks.
People that spread negativity, just for the sake of it, are as toxic as smoke. I don’t mean depressed people, because their negativity is genuine and authentic. I mean the ones that want to pick on anything and everything just for the sake of saying something; they pick on you, others, the decoration of the table, the taste of the food. These people are not depressed, they are just unaware. Most don’t see how harmful it is. Most don’t want to spread negativity, just like smokers don’t want to cause asthma, but they do. Why?
Why is it so hard for some to say nice things, just for the sake of being nice. What is it that makes us so greedy with nice words, and praise? Is it that we think it is going to make the one you offer compliments to egoistic and self obsessed? Or is it just a conventional way of talking in some cultures? I experience this often with parents to children, and I don’t doubt for a second that the parents love their kids. Is it that they want to “prepare” the kids for the “real world”, or are they themselves unconfident and worried about it? What ever it is, it has been shown in plenty of studies that negativity in workforces, at home, in school…everywhere, is leading to more negativity and worse results. The opposite leads to more Prana, life force.
When we see this, we can observe ourselves and release it, as we teach at the Olive Retreats (mind detox). We can understand what we do and why, and then stop it if we don’t like what we do, and make others aware of it too. We can see the beauty instead, and feel grateful. When we feel negative, instead of expressing it, we can simply not say anything until we need help to understand a persistent negative feeling. To feel negative; sad, anxious, mad, etc, is totally OK, we all do, it’s human. To be negative is part of what we call the duality or relativism. It’s there whether we want it to be or not. It is even good to feel negative sometimes, but not healthy to stay in it, and spread it to others if there is no value to them – that’s a negative monologue. To talk openly and understand ourselves and others, is a totally different thing. That makes us grow and become compassionate. Everything can be said, it just depends on how it is said.