We saw a lot of churches the last day in Prague. The heavy Gothic style with all it’s allegories showed Christianity’s worst sin; to doubt God. Later that evening I got a mail that made me doubt, nothing but doubt, I saw no solution. I felt terrible, the doubt really got me. I flew home and the first thing my daughter talks about is the ‘doubt-thing’ in Christianity!
After seeing a movie about a templar she understood how important it is to never give up to doubt. It hit me how utterly right she is, and that I never really saw the beauty in this Christian teaching (seeing God as father). To only doubt – others, oneself and the universe, is nothing we should teach our kids, but we do; careful there…watch out with… It’s depressing! No energy. I wasn’t brought up in any religion, but the ‘new one’, science, based on questioning. Questioning without hope and trust is doubt, it can be exhausting. We need to question to understand, but not doubt.
To trust, hope and have faith is healthy and loving. It’s Prana, life vitality, energy. A person that trusts is positive, and nice to be around. Doubt is to be negative, it’s mass. Doubt stops creativity, the energy that creates solutions. The non-mass solution is trust, belief, hope and faith. Funny enough Buddhism teaches doubt, but really it’s saying not to believe in the illusion of matter, in what we see, so isn’t it the same thing?
Long ago I decided to go into new relationships and situations without doubt, if for nothing else because it creates ‘happy hormones’. Doubt creates stress hormones. It makes us judgmental, skeptical, sad and over sensitive. And when there is uncertainty I trust the future me will solve the problem (if it appears). Imagine a world where we first trust everyone we meet. So why did I fall into doubt again? I think it’s time to detox, but more on that tomorrow.